Instant Dates are all about LEADING, LEADING, and LEADING! If you can land instant dates consistently, then you are on the right path! However, instant dates ARE NOT easy to get. It’s not easy for you, a perfect stranger; to approach a woman, transition into a hook, keep her engaged for a good chunk of time, and then convince her to drop her plans and accept going with you on a date on the spot. This is why you must NOT BE AFRAID to LEAD the interaction NO MATTER HOW GREAT THE INTERACTION “FEELS”. No matter how hot the girl is or how well it’s going, you should NEVER take a girl in the daytime seriously by just ”playing it safe”. You should always be pulling the trigger for an instant date.
This is a common “PUA” term that is used and can be a deadly weapon in initiating an instant date. It basically means that you mention a certain amount of time that you have left to talk. Ex: I have to actually meet my friend in the next 10 minutes, but getting back to (conversation topic)…..” You necessarily don’t have to leave, but the point of this is to show that you do have other things going on your life and you are not going to take up much of her time, plus when you mention this, she may feel pressure to invest as well, which is a good thing!
Now I’m going to provide 3 tips on how to get instant dates more consistently, bearing in mind that you have the set hooked (AKA – approached, transitioned, and got her engaged). Do be WARNED though, if you try to RUSH for the instant date, you will probably get rejected. Learn how to control and relax the speed of your speech when going for the instant date.
This is a common sales tactic used in order to have a client to say yes to small things so then it would turn into a yes into the bigger thing. When you have a girl hooked in a conversation, you always want to TEST out the level of investment from her end by having her move with you to another area and/or section.
Let’s say you approach a girl in the street and you have built enough comfort for her to be engaged. You want to create a reason for her to move (whether it’s near you or somewhere else) because “ people are walking and you don’t want to get in their way” or “because you have to show her something really cool”. The point is you want her to move WITH you even if it’s 2 or 3 inches. If she complies then you continue the conversation and lead her for a drink/coffee/juice very subtly. BUT – YOU MUST TEST it first by seeing if she complies with the SMALL level of investment first. If she does not agree for the date, BUT she has complied with the small level of investment, then schedule a date on the spot and include the time and place.
IF it’s at a bookstore, and you have her engaged – then you “have to show her the coolest book ever” because this way she will move with you to a special section of the store. The more you lead the interaction, the more she follows.
This can be a fun tactic to use when you have the girl engaged with you already in a fun conversation. If her level of engagement is high and she is becoming absorbed in your world with your vibe and stories; then when you are about to go into a story, right after you start it, interrupt, scratch your throat and tell her you are thirsty for some juice or water and tell her to come with you for like 5 minutes and you’ll continue the story.
So for example (girl is already hooked in conversation) – “Wow Sarah, I actually have to tell you this one time I was in Miami and I ended up being on the Jersey Shore……(I would then interrupt myself, scratch my throat)…”I’m actually like really thirsty right now, come get juice for 5 minutes with me and I’ll continue” . So you will notice that the girl is already hooked in the conversation, and as I am about to get into a fun story, I interrupt, scratch my throat, tell her that I’m thirsty, and use a false-time constraint. You want to interrupt just as you are about to reach the peak of the story to create more intrigue so she will “follow the leader.”
It’s very common that most men that do go for instant dates do fail because they make it transparent in their intentions when asking for a girl to go on a date on the spot which results in an off vibe OR they built comfort, but not nearly enough and just want to skip to the instant date. Once again, if the interaction is hooked, you have built enough comfort, and you have her engaged with you…you can simply throw out a false time constraint: I’m meeting my friend, Sarah (ALWAYS use a girl’s name to increase your value) in 20-30 minutes, but I like your energy and I want to grab juice/coffee with you…then I have to be out. If she says YES, then you lead her to the spot. NOW, she may say NO but will give you her number, and once again schedule a date with her on the spot and choose a time and place. You CAN ALSO use TIP 1 as a tester to see if she would move with you initially.
REMEMBER – IF a girl doesn’t have time to go on an instant date, DO NOT take it personally. Instead, grab her number and schedule a date on the spot. Make sure you schedule it as soon as possible so this way it’s fresh in her mind.
Instant dates ARE NOT EASY. It takes loads and loads of practice. Know your landmarks and have ideas already for places in knowing to lead instant dates such as coffee shops, bars, juice spots, etc. You also have to be willing to work on the fundamentals that are in your control so you can build comfort easier with a woman. Each girl in stranger approach should be looked at as a practice dummy. The more time you have with the girl than the more you can practice your fundamentals. I’ll be writing an article soon on physical escalation in the day time.